The nine most terrifying words an employee can hear are, “I’m your coach and I’m here to help you.”

Front-line employees dread these words because they know what’s coming. It will be a one-sided conversation in which their well-intentioned supervisor will proceed to point out a list of things they did wrong (“opportunities for improvement”) when dealing with a customer.

Over the years I’ve listened to hundreds of supervisors share their frustration with the coaching process. Often they are mystified. They cannot understand why, after repeatedly telling their employees what behavior changes they want them to make, weeks go by and nothing changes. Cajoling doesn’t work. Threats fall on deaf ears. Supervisors wonder if their people are actually hearing what they are telling them.

I would ask the supervisors to think back to the words they used to describe what they did in their coaching sessions. I could see the light bulbs go on. The operative word was “tell.” This became one of those Aha! moments.

Six Secrets to Better Coaching

1. Start with the right intention.
The days of using a “command and control” or the “tell” approach are long gone.  You will get much better results if you view your role as helping each employee discover for themselves what they they can do differently — and what they are doing particularly well.
2. Give your people some credit.
Telling someone what they already know they could have done differently during an exchange with a customer can be downright insulting. Most of the time they realize they made an error.
3. Stifle yourself.
Have a SODA. Stop for millisecond before speaking (this is the hardest part!). Observe the situation for what it is — you are there to help the person discover what they could improve upon. Decide and commit to taking a more consultative approach. Act. Follow through by asking the right questions to help the person find their own answers.
4. Ask not tell.
This is the key to being a more effective coach. Get in the habit of asking open-ended, discovery questions. You can’t miss by starting your sentences with: “Who, What, Where, When, How, Why.”  “How did you think that went? If you had the chance to do this over again, what would you do differently?  
5. Look for the Aha! moment.
You know that your coaching session is successful when the person critiques their behavior and comes to the same conclusions that you did. If they don’t see the problem, that is the time to give them feedback.
6. End with with a 2 to 1.
Leave every coaching session on a positive note. You should have agreed on 2 things he or she did particularly well and should keep doing and 1 specific behavior they intend to change.

I guarantee that when you integrate these ideas into your personal coaching style, you’ll get much better results and instead of your employees cringing when you sit down to coach you will get a big ol’ smile.

Be  happy. Have great week — and if you live in the US have a terrific Labor Day holiday. Look for the next Monday Aha! on Sept. 13, 2010.

2010 © Barbara Burke. All rights reserved.

Has this ever happened to you? A rumor gets started, picking up steam with every passing day until it penetrates the entire organization. It didn’t matter that the rumor was untrue. For employees, perception became reality.

A few months ago, I saw what happened when the employees in a large contact center believed a false rumor. The company is a large outsourcer that takes inbound customer service calls for several U.S. utilities. Word spread among the front-line reps that their biggest client was unhappy and had decided not to renew their contract. Once the rumor mill kicked into gear, it wasn’t long before the reps were spinning multiple worst-case scenarios. Convinced that there was going to be a major lay off, employee morale tanked and so did their performance.

Luckily, the center’s manager was an old hand at dealing with rumor-generated panic. She understood that Nature abhors a vacuum. Absent the facts, it is natural for people to speculate about what could be true. Enter the rumor hill.

She also subscribed to what I call, the “Rule of Five.” That is, if you want a group of employees to really “get” an important message, delivering it once is never enough. The same message should be delivered at least five times and in five different ways. Even then, you’ll be lucky if 80% of the group actually take it to heart.

As it turned out, when the employees learned that the client wasn’t going anywhere and had, in fact, just inked a new multi-year contract, they breathed a collective sigh of relief. Confidence was restored. Performance scores shot up and service levels went back to normal.

The Lesson: The best way to prevent damaging rumors is timely, factual information. If the information is important, be on the safe side and follow the Rule of Five.

2010 © Barbara Burke. All Rights Reserved. www.barbaraburke.com
If you’d like to include this or any of the Monday Aha!s in your blog or company newsletter, I would appreciate it if you would print the following at the bottom: “2010 © Barbara Burke. All Rights Reserved. www.barbaraburke.com”

Mr. Slater shoulda had a SODA.

By now you’ve probably heard about Steven Slater, the JetBlue flight attendant who after arguing with a passenger behaving badly, announced on the loud speaker system that he’d had it, grabbed a couple of beers, opened a door and slid down the emergency chute.

If you work in customer service you know the feeling. You’ve had those days when if there was a window to open and a chute available you’d be tempted to do the same thing. The fact is if you deal with customers every day, a certain percentage of them will behave badly.

A lose-lose situation.
Actually, getting angry at customers is a choice we make. If you find yourself reacting in any of the following ways, you have fallen into the trap of taking customers’ anger personally.

> Backatcha. Getting angry at angry customers results in disaster.
> Oh, ya! I’ll show you whose right! Nobody wins the blame game.
> Throw gasoline on the fire. Knowingly making a remark to make an angry customer even angrier is downright sick.
> Crumble. Internalize the anger, suffer and get so stressed you get ill — or quit.
> Hang up. The equivalent of exiting out the window.

A win-win situation.
There is a healthier way to handle irate customers. That is to have a SODA (Stop.Observe.Decide.Act) This is an ancient four-step formula for dealing with emotionally-charged situations skillfully.
> Stop. It’s only natural to have the fight or flight response when you feel you are being attacked. The key to maintaining emotional control is to stop yourself from reacting automatically. It’s a nanosecond that makes all the difference.
> Observe. Once you make the choice to retain control, you see the situation for what it is: the customer is angry about their situation. It’s really not about you!
> Decide. Instead of expending energy getting angry and getting nowhere, you focus on deciding which solutions to offer the customer.
> Act. This last step is the pay off. The customer gets their problem solved, you feel empowered and confident knowing you did the best you could. It is clearly a win-win situation.

Mr. Slater would have been better off trading those two beers and a slide for a SODA.

Be happy. Enjoy your week.

2010 © Barbara Burke. All Rights Reserved. www.barbaraburke.com

I hope you enjoy this week’s Monday Aha! and that you pass it on to your friends and colleagues. Better yet, encourage them to subscribe (at right) to receive it every Monday in their inbox.
If you’d like to include this or any of the Monday Aha!s in your blog or company newsletter, I would appreciate it if you would print the following at the bottom: “2010 © Barbara Burke. All Rights Reserved. www.barbaraburke.com”

The SODA concept and this Aha! are from my customer service fable about a CSR in a call center, The Napkin,The Melon & The Monkey.
> Synopsis of the book.
> Listen to Chapter One.
> Buy the Book direct from the Publisher (at 50% off the cover price)